Thursday, December 09, 2004

Rabbi Mordechai Tendler: Hiding Behind his Wife's Skirt - RCA/Praesidim investigation highlight #1

18 Comments:

At 12:48 PM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

RCA/Praesidim investigation highlight #1
How Rabbi Mordechai Tendler operates:

In response, to an anonymous letter sent dealing with the allegations against Rabbi Mordechai Tendler, his wife sent long handwritten signed letters to various possible suspects, accusing each of writing the anonymous letter.

The letters contained:
1) angry statements
2) threats of Gehenom
3) personal details of the personal problems of several victims, that had only been told to her husband in “confidential” counseling sessions (not told to his wife by any of the victims)
4) A confirmation that her husband paid a settlement to an alleged victim on the advice of lawyers
5) Many clearly false allegations against critics

Clearly, Rabbi Mordechai Tendler uses his wife as a shield and a sword against his victims and their supporters in this case by feeding her both a combination of confidential and false information and then sending her out to fight his battles.

Rabbi Mordechai Tendler, hiding behind his wife's skirt.

 
At 12:57 PM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

As reported at: http://yourmoralleader.blogspot.com

I'm putting together a few posts based on the RCA/Praesidium investigation. I don't want to tell victims' stories or identify individual victims' stories. But I'm completely disgusted by what the RCA and Tendler supporters are doing. They're basically intimidating victims and trying to whitewash the whole situation.

But I do want to send a message to Rabbi Mordechai Tendler and his
supporters that this will no longer be tolerated.

To do this I will be disclosing how Rabbi Mordechai Tendler operates. What his MO is, how he grooms women he exploits, how he intimidates his critics. I will be disclosing some of the "pick-up" lines he uses with married women and agunot, where he likes to have sex and other tidbits. Some of this information is salacious in nature but midah k'neged midah. If Tendler and his goons want to intimidate victims they need to know there will be severe
consequences.

It may take a few days to edit this material before I post it as I want to be very careful.

I was approached about a year-and-a-half/2 years ago to look into this situation. So be assured, I've dotted my i's and crossed my t's.

My information identifies 10 distinct female victims, only 9 have
co-operated with the RCA/Praesidium investigation. The 10th has signed a confidentiality agreement with Rabbi Tendler for a reported $100,000 and an agreement to turn over physical evdence to Tendler and to never discuss the matter with anyone ever again.

 
At 1:41 PM, Blogger Steven I. Weiss said...

Why are you putting your posts in the comments? It makes your blog a bad read.

 
At 1:57 PM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

>At 1:41 PM, Steven I. Weiss said...
>Why are you putting your posts in the comments?
>It makes your blog a bad read.

L’fi aniyato d’ati, there are advantages to this format:
1) Forces me to use succinct and catchy post headers.
2) You don’t have to scroll up or down long posts.
3) More posts display on a page.
4) You don’t like the subject, you don’t have to read the post.
5) It’s a unique style I’ve become known for and at this point characterizes me.

But, I appreciate the constructive criticism SIW and welcome others to critique my new blog. I will evaluate all advice in making future upgrades/changes.

Thanks.

 
At 5:24 PM, Blogger Shmarya said...

Go to typepad.com and get a cheap (not free) blog there. You can have a headline, a brief excerpt of your post, and then a continuation on another page (after the jump). If this is the style you want, Typepad is the place to get it. It's worth the money.

 
At 6:13 PM, Blogger Avi said...

have we reached out to the 9 women and made certain that they feel safe? We can't allow Tendler (or anyone else) to get away with intimidation...Avi...

 
At 3:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What drives many of us bananas is the righteous indignation the sex-busters here and at the Awareness Center (same people, two places) are so quick to issue when the people they attack dare respond with anything short of s complete acceptance of their own condemnation and a public ceremony to remove their testicles.

Rabbi Tendler is not hiding behind anything. Rabbi Tendler is using the means within his grasp to defend his good name. Does he not have to right to do it? Should he take instruction from you as to how to defend his own good name?

Then, every time these sex-busters are challenged, it is an "intimidation." You can no longer inquire where they got their information, what was the verification process, was the accused person engaged in the inquiry, were the authorities contacted and what was their reaction. No, you dare suggest any of the above and you are accused of intimidation.

Finally, when you make the argument too succinctly for them to be able to respond at all, they curse you out, threaten to expose your own anonymity, which they proceed to do. Their own threats become unveiled and personal.

This is a pathetic group with lonely lives and the rest of us are watching it the way you slow down to watch a car wreck on the highway.

 
At 6:06 AM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

Thanks Shmarya for the advice. But for now I like this blog style/format.

 
At 6:09 AM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

>have we reached out to the 9 women and made certain that they
>feel safe? We can't allow Tendler (or anyone else) to get away
>with intimidation...Avi...

Good point, I hope to address in future posts. Part of the RCA fiasco has been to isolate these women and not to provide them with counsellng or legal representation.

 
At 6:21 AM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

>What drives many of us bananas is the righteous indignation the
>sex-busters here and at the Awareness Center (same people, two
>places) are so quick to issue when the people they attack dare
>respond with anything short of s complete acceptance of their own
>condemnation and a public ceremony to remove their testicles.

I'm definately not the Awareness Center.

Dude, the allegation here is that a religious leader preyed on and sexually exploited women he counselled. That includes married women and agunot. Further, the allegation is that the RCA has violated the confidentiality of these women who came forward in a professional investigation.

Where is your righteous indignation?

>Rabbi Tendler is not hiding behind anything. Rabbi Tendler is
>using the means within his grasp to defend his good name.

He certaily is hiding and using his wife, lawyers, supporters to silence and intimidate his alleged victims.

Let him be a man and address the allegations directly instead of sending out others todo his dirty work.

>Does he not have to right to do it? Should he take instruction
>from you as to how to defend his own good name?

He has no good name. He should stop hiding behind his wife's skirt and his lawyers.

>Then, every time these sex-busters are challenged, it is
>an "intimidation." You can no longer inquire where they got their
>information, what was the verification process, was the accused
>person engaged in the inquiry, were the authorities contacted and
>what was their reaction. No, you dare suggest any of the above
>and you are accused of intimidation.

All my information in the past has proved accurate. Read the latest newspaper article. I've been saying much of this for months.

>Finally, when you make the argument too succinctly for them to be
>able to respond at all, they curse you out, threaten to expose
>your own anonymity, which they proceed to do. Their own threats
>become unveiled and personal.

I believe you haven't made any succient arguments. You clearly don't even know the facts of this situation (as usual).

>This is a pathetic group with lonely lives

I'm not lonely. I have many friends.

>and the rest of us are
>atching it the way you slow down to watch a car wreck on the
>highway.

Maybe once in a while you could stop long enough to help?

 
At 6:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kindly compare, question and answer below:

Q: Does he not have the right to [defend himself]? Should he take instruction from you as to how to defend his own good name?

A: He has no good name. He should stop hiding behind his wife's skirt and his lawyers.
Asked and answered. This is the driving internal logic of the person running this blog. The accused not only has no good name, but any attempt on his part to defend himself is yet another example of cowardice.

In the middle ages they used to test if a woman was a witch by dunking her in the water. If she floated it meant she was a witch and should be burnt. If she drowned it meant she was a righteous woman. This is the extent of your moral stand, these are the dynamics of your way of thinking and this is the reason why you are both extremely harmful and destined to remain without a real voice.

Notice that I didn't use any insulting words, nor did I express any doubt as to your personal qualities. I would appreciate it if you could respond by simply relating to the problematic thinking emerging from the juxtaposing of the question and answer segment above.

 
At 6:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some segments of the christian church have a system where if any allegations of sexual misconduct are brought against a clergy member they are mandated to undergo a full evaluation by professionals trained to screen for potential offenders. They can test to see if a person is sexually attracted to children for example. Why can't the RCA adopt a system like this?

 
At 7:08 AM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

>This is the driving internal logic of the person running this
>blog. The accused not only has no good name

No, just this accused in this specific case has no good name. Try to deal with the facts.

>but any attempt on
>his part to defend himself is yet another example of cowardice.

But he hasn't defended himself. He leaves that to his enablers who he uses to attack others.

>In the middle ages they used to test if a woman was a witch by
>dunking her in the water. If she floated it meant she was a witch
>and should be burnt. If she drowned it meant she was a righteous
>woman. This is the extent of your moral stand, these are the
>dynamics of your way of thinking and this is the reason why you
>are both extremely harmful and destined to remain without a real
>voice.

Nonsense, there was a professional investigation over the past year. This is now all documented by an independent party.

>Notice that I didn't use any insulting words, nor did I express
>any doubt as to your personal qualities.

An improvement, now try to clean up your language (removing their...), logic and the quality of your arguments (wiches).

>I would appreciate it if you could respond by simply relating to
>the problematic thinking emerging from the juxtaposing of the
>question and answer segment above.

Simple, let Rabbi Mordechai Tendler address these issues personally. Let him stop hiding behind his wife/lawyer/supporters. Let him stop using the threat of personal disclosures against his alleged victims and their supporters.

see Jewish Week article:
>Rabbi Tendler, who is married and has eight children, has chosen
>not to respond publicly, but has strongly denied all charges
>through his attorney. His supporters insist he is an outstanding
>spiritual leader who is now paying the price for agreeing to
>counsel hundreds of people, including women who are emotionally
>and psychologically unstable.

This obviously hasn't stopped him from using others (see post concerning wife's letters) to respond by passing on confidences and false information.

Stop hiding behind your wife's skirt Rabbi Mordechai Tendler.

 
At 7:13 AM, Blogger jewishwhistleblower said...

>At 6:58 AM, Anonymous said...
>Some segments of the christian church have a system where if any
>allegations of sexual misconduct are brought against a clergy
>member they are mandated to undergo a full evaluation by
>professionals trained to screen for potential offenders. They can
>test to see if a person is sexually attracted to children for
>example. Why can't the RCA adopt a system like this?

Because the RCA's system is deeply flawed and there is a systemic problem if during an investigation they give one party a file with all the confidential information.

The RCA has shown they are not interested in protecting vulnerable victim's rights. No counselling resources, no independent legal representation and now no confidentiality. They've isolated these women and dragged this investigation on. No steps have been taken to protect potential victims from Tendler in the interim.

This is a whitewash, plain and simple.

 
At 5:24 PM, Blogger MARIO LORENZO said...

Wow. I cannot believe the level of behavior that Rabbi Tendler stooped to. Just reading the HORRORS that Jillian described shake me to the core. Enough to make me want to go and persue the Bhuddist studies where this now self-described Jewish-Bhuddist has found her comfort. "He probed into issues that SHE felt were inappropriate"?! He "offered to study philosophy with her privately"?! TERRIBLE! Just TERRIBLE! Rabbi Tendler helped to "drive [her and her husband] apart"?! She and a number of her children have left the normative Orthodox world. Jillian blames her neighborhood, her synagogue, her children's Yeshivas etc. etc. for everything that has gone wrong. I pity those who she counsels, though I am sure the numbers will be few...and even those few will be only those who reflect the same unstable spiritual mindset that she possesses.

 
At 6:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was curious what kind of out reach there is in the community to help Tendler's wife and children deal with the fact that Rabbi Tendler is a sexual preditor? It's obvious they will need counseling. Are there resources in the Monsey area that offer these sorts of services? I know in other area's there's support groups for spouses of sex offenders. There really needs to be something like that in Monsey. I'm sure this isn't the only case that's going on there.

 
At 11:55 AM, Blogger lachmeet said...

Don't drag Michelle and their kids into this. They are completely innocent. Michelle has every right to want to defend her husband. She is unfortuantely, like many women out there who are afraid to take action against their own husbands and she chooses to turn a blind eye and defend him. It is a sad situation for her and her children. Would you really expect her to leave him at this juction in her life. While the Jofen women are very strong and independent shw could never leave him. I guess its sort of like Hillary and Bill. She, however should have realized that his actions of locking doors in the house or staying long hours in the shul was no good. I know she tried to convince him to break ties with the women, especially the few that could be legitimately termed "mentally unstable". There were women who would literally just stand in front of his house at all hours of the day to see him. Or push their way in shul to speak to him. It was wild to see this go on.

 
At 5:22 PM, Blogger elya ber wachtfogel said...

he told her that if she will do anything he will be oker the kidushin l'mafreya

 

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